Love At First Sight? Maybe, Not! (Part 6) ~Finale~

"Ken! Wait! Happy Holidays..." I said as I grabbed a strap on Ken's bag. He pulled the strap free from my hand, turned around and marched away angrily. I smirked at him, not feeling guilt as I knew that I did everything I could to work things out. Goodbye Ken, forever, I thought...

The start of that year was a memorable one. We got the best teacher as our class teacher, Mrs. Jessica. She was extremely fun and made lessons joyful for everyone. She had a habit of arranging students in class based on their ranks. One thing you should have realized by now is that Ken and I never sat together. I preferred to sit with Yvonne and Serina to avoid friends from teasing me with Ken. And yet, I hoped that some day, we would get to sit with each other. Thanks to Mrs. Jessica's system, the day came where Ken and I who were ranked second and first, respectively, ended up beside each other in class.

Ever since that day, we smiled at each other and just loved each other's company. We talked about stuff and even teased Yvonne, Serina and Aden who sat nearby. We took on the responsibility as class librarians and helped our classmates borrow books from our mini library and in that process, we had many arguments that ended rather cutely. I soon began to realize that I liked Ken a lot. I didn't want to ever leave his side. But unfortunately there came a time where Ken began neglecting me.

He had recently befriended some girls from the next class and spent a lot of time with them. I was beginning to get worried but I trusted him and didn't think much of it. That's when Derek became more prominent in life. Derek had been my classmate since I was 7 but I had never once developed a crush on him. But after Ken started avoiding me slightly, I felt Derek's presence a lot. His smile, his laughter, everything was heartwarming and I enjoyed his company. However, the biggest mistake I ever made was telling Ken about Derek. I mentioned the fact that I developed a small crush on Derek and that broke Ken's heart. He cried in class about it and soon complained to all his friend. I tried to explain that I liked him much more, that he meant much more than Derek, but nothing worked. By the end of that week, Ken told me it's better for us to stop liking each other and decided to ask Alisha to date him that very day!

I should have known then, that a guy who was willing to date another girl the second he stops seeing the first one can only bring trouble and yet, my heart sought out for him. I cried when I found out about Alisha and begged him to be with me. After a couple of days, Alisha herself could see that Ken still liked me so she decided to back off. Ever since then, I promised to be sincere to Ken and trusted that he liked me truly. There even came an event soon after that convinced me completely of our feelings for each other.

We were out in the field trying gymnastics as it was part of our health education. I was always thrilled about gymnastics so I attempted one of the moves confidently. Unfortunately, my landing turned out wrongly and i ended up sitting on my hand and hence fracturing it. At that instant, I knew something was wrong. I tried to calm down but I was afraid. Mrs. Jessica called my mum and she rushed to my aid. I was afraid of what my mum would say so, without realizing, I started tearing. I walked away from the class while holding my fractured hand. As I was walking away, I turned to look back. I saw Ken running towards the class from the field only to see me leaving. A tear trickled down his cheek as he shook his head to signal me that it'll be alright. I nodded back scared but comforted by his presence. That moment, everything seemed like it would work out. I didn't expect the eruption that occurred a few months later...

The school organized a trip to a safari park after our major exams. We were all excited about it and planned on how we were going to spend the day together. But, unfortunately, Ken was never there during our class' group discussion on our plans. We suggested that we spend it together the whole day, so I assumed Ken knew about it. All throughout the week before the trip, he hung out with the girls from the next class. My jealousy began to boil up again. I was beginning to get pretty mad and yet I still trusted him and hoped that he would spend time with me during the trip. Each day went by slowly as everyone anticipated the arrival of the day of the trip.

The day finally arrived. Excitement was an understatement for what we felt. We were only twelve so we expressed our feelings by jumping and hopping around. I was amused by how everyone was reacting. I got on the bus and sat beside Serina. I looked around for Ken but he sat really far away. I felt a sort of pang in my chest. A feeling that he had decided to avoid me. I just ignored it and tried to enjoy the trip. Occasionally I glanced at Ken but he didn't even notice me. All of a sudden, Ken and Denis went missing from our group. I wanted to look for him but my Serina and Aden asked me to just enjoy the trip and forget about Ken for awhile. I decided to just enjoy the day with my classmates, all the while, mad at Ken for ditching us all. Derek, Serina and Aden took my mind out of things.

We spent the whole day together, sticking with awesome Mrs. Jessica. I tried not to think about Ken. Just when things were going on well, suddenly, we bumped into Ken and the girls from the next class. I felt the pang in my chest again. He ditched us all for those GIRLS! I wanted to shout at him but just decided to walk away. He didn't even pay attention to me. Tears filled my eyes but I blinked them back as I didn't want to appear weak. I spent the rest of the trip burning inside, thinking about Ken's preferences. Why is he with them? Why did he ditch us all? I decided to ask him as we got onto the bus.

Everybody was rushing and we got pushed around. Ken was pushed extremely far away from me so I couldn't talk to him at all. In the end, I decided to write my message on a piece of paper.

I passed the paper to Serina and asked her to pass it all the way to Ken. The paper was passed from one person to the other until it reached him. His expression began to change as he read the paper. The girls from the other class began asking him questions but he brushed them off. I watched patiently as he continued to read. He began to look for me in the crowd and found me. Our eyes met. What once used to feel lovely, now felt painful. He stared with no attraction at all, merely annoyance. He got on the bus first and sat away from me as he did earlier. He began to write a reply and passed it back to me.

I knew instantly what to say to that. I tore out another piece of paper I had and wrote my message as fast as possible.

Again I passed the paper forward and was beginning to get annoyed with this. Just as I was about to get up and walk towards Ken's place on that moving bus, he passed his reply back. I sat back down and waited for the reply. What could he possibly want to say? But what I read shocked me...

I couldn't understand why he said that. Did I say something extremely wrong? I sent several apology notes to him after that but he just ignored them. After we got off the bus, I called after him but he pretended not to hear and just walked away. I spent that entire month apologizing although I didn't quite know what my mistake was. Then one day, all my other friends told me to get over Ken. They told me that he had changed and that no matter how much I tried, he wouldn't talk to me. I was crushed, burning on the inside but I tried to stay strong. I tried to fill my time with other things but I kept bumping into Ken and we only ended up arguing. Those lips that once said such wonderful things about me began to argue with me and support those girls from the other class.

I never once cried. I didn't want to waste my tears on such a confusing situation. I was quite puzzled about the entire thing and tried asking Ken why he was doing this to me, but I never did find out then. So I changed, changed to become more jovial, to fill up my emptiness with some excitement. I changed the way I was, the way I behaved. I became more like my real self, talkative, bold, and crazy. Although Ken and I occasionally argued, my memories of his existence began to disappear. Ken was being swept out of my memories. My last attempt to speak to him that year was when I pulled his bag's strap, but even that failed. In the end, Ken became a distant memory. So did we stay together forever? Did we stay true to each other and end up to be soulmates? The answer is, NO! Infatuation is only understood when one truly falls in love. Did I ever fall in love to find out that my feelings for Ken was a childish crush??? Stay tuned to La Mia Storia to find out. Coming soon... Love and War (Part 1)